A Man's Perfect Catch

What is a catch for the average male? We all know that men love a good looking girl with a killer body, i mean thats a given. But what do they truely seek in a mate.

I put this question to many of my male friends, colleagues, and even my alpha male brothers and this is what i was told that their ideal partner would have the following attributes (looks and killer body aside):

Is single
Educated and smart
Confident and outgoing
Has a job
Has no children
Does not live with parents
Can laugh at herself
Has a good sense of humour
Can sometimes be one of the boys (not all the time though)
Sex
Has maternal instincts
Can cook
Wants kids
Can let me hang with my boys
Can pretend to enjoy watching sports (i laughed at that one)
Has her own teeth and hair- unless the extentions look good.

When I had compiled the list I looked at it and thought this describes the majority of my beautiful single friends (and my single self too) so what does this mean? Maybe they like the idea of their ideal woman possessing some if not all of the above but when confronted with a woman like that in reality they get the case of 'its not you, it's me'. A shame we do not come with a 28 days returns receipt, just an easily broken heart.

LSGS

Spelling Bee Champion.... not when i am ranting!

A good friend and avid follower of my blog rants pointed out to me today that "oi you, you have millions of spelling and grammer errors in that last blog post". My first thought was "OMG, I make a living out of writing, and I am known as a total grammer Nazi, so how is this so?".

Then I realised that when i am rambling on in my blog my mind truely switches off- as i get into rant mode. My "wheres" becomes "weres", my "excepts" becomes "accepts" and so forth. This is my time to put my anal ways aside and just write.

But going forward, Ms Spot the spelling/grammer mistake, I will be sure to check and double check my post before publishing it- Scouts honour!!!

LSGS

When a girl compromises

When you start reaching a certain and age and you are still a single unmarried woman you can go one of two ways:


(1) you still believe that you are going to get tall dark handsome dream man or else, you will rather stay single and settle on a tabby cat for company

OR

(2) you decide to compromise and take the attitude of so what "he is only 5ft3" or "has bad dandruff" or "is a bit fat" or "picks his nose and eats it" or "he is a street sweeper" or even "so what he has the face only a mother can love", you compromise because you want to find someone who loves you and you want to get (lets say it together girls) "MARRIED".


Well I decided in the New Year to try out option 2, and 13 days into 2011 I am about to break the resolution, and let me tell you why.


I decided to give a rather geeky and might I add ginger man a chance. He had been bugging me for a date since October 2010, and I had been refusing because I thought "he is sooooo not my type". Then at the start of the year, he was still being persistent, so I decided that a New Year, New Start attitude might serve me well in 2011. So when he asked me out yet again, I said yes.


At first he seemed shocked that I finally caved in and with his confidence boosted he started to text me sweet nothings. After some chit chat we arranged to meet for drinks, I thought dinner could easily turn into a longwinded affair, and that just drinks keeps it short and sweet. So I suggested Wednesday evening and he agreed.


I felt happy that I had decided to give him chance. He seemed nice and sometimes love can come blossom with men you never thought you could love. Note: we made the date on Sunday evening.


On Monday, I hear nothing from him and I think nothing of it. Tuesday, still nothing and find that a bit strange considering his enthusiusm before, Wednesday morning I have heard nothing still and wondered whether we were still meeting. 5pm Wednesday evening still not a peep from Mr Enthusiusm. I decide not to call/text him to ask him why he hasnt been in touch, a girl has her pride you know.


So Date Night AKA Wednesday evening comes and goes, and nothing. Now it is Thursday evening and I am still wondering what happened to him. He still hasnt been in touch. After being so persistent for over 3 months to get a date I am quite pissed off (excuse the language) that he is playing deaf and dumb with me.


All I have to say now is that he better be meeting his maker or on his way there, because there really is no other excuse that I am willing to except, especially since i comprised my wants and allowed a nobody the opportunity to ask a somebody for a date.



LSGS

Saluting our ex loves, Ghetto Fabulous style...x

Ladies (and some gentlemen)....

Lets bow our heads and salut all our past, present and future ex lovers by singing along loud and proud (something I have been doing today) to ghetto fabulous Keyshia Cole's "I Changed my Mind"- I am feeling generous today so just click on the link below and enjoy her music video below- enjoy!

This song, right next to disco queen Gloria Gaynor's "I will Survive", should be the national anthem for singles everywhere who are going through or have been through a (bad) breakup.

LSGS

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LbE1qz8wktQ

Restoring my faith in relationships- couples style!

Sometime between my optimistic love is all around phase, and my all men are bastards phase, I have found myself fighting the need to not wallow in the world of "I will never find someone".

I have slowly but surely been turning into a cynical 30 something- sad but true. That being said my saviour has come in the form of my favourite couple, lets call them Mr and Mrs AB. Whilst spending New Years with them they managed the impossible- restoring my faith in relationships (whisper- and men).

Mr and Mrs AB are a fabulous married couple. Mrs AB and I are friends. She is a great giggle and we always enjoy each others company. Mr AB is her patient husband who always keeps smiling even when Mrs AB and I turn into two overexcited females when discussing shopping and other frivilous topics, he just always looks at us with an amused look.

They are truely a couple who have found the holy grail of marriage. They have a love and respect for eachother that we all seek but rarely find. I look at them and think "ahhhhh", and having spent New Years with them, I am now thinking "double ahhhhh".

Mr and Mrs AB are not alone, I would say 90% of my friends are either in a long term relationships or already married. It is only I and one other friend who still grace the land of singledom. We are eachother's cheerleader and always discuss the good, the bad, and the ugly of the single life. She knows who she is.

Coming back to the topic at hand, whilst in NY I was constantly around Mr and Mrs AB, they made me believe in the fact that there truely is someone out there for everyone. It is not about finding the perfect man, but about finding someone who can love you for all that you are- the good and the bad.

So Mr and Mrs AB, thank you for restoring my faith in finding love. If I even find a slither of what you have, then I know that I am going to be happy woman indeed.

-LSGS

Taking the time tunnel....OMG I have never felt soooo old!!!

Today I took a trip down memory lane, whilst flipping through a photo album.


Do you remember life before the ipod, cd's, DVD's and reality tv! Which brings me to the question, are you an 80's kid or 90's kid? Keep reading and you will blush with embarrasement, cry with laughter or even just smile as you think of the days when you were young....


You were an 80's Kid if...


1. You had a crush on one of the New Kids on the Block members.
2. You can remember what Michael Jackson looked like before his nose fell off.
3. You wore a banana clip or one of those slap on wristbands at some point during your youth.
4.You wore French rolls on the bottom of your splatter painted jeans. You had slouch socks, and puff painted your own shirt at least once.
5. You owned a doll with 'Xavier Roberts' signed on its butt.
6. You know the profound meaning of ''Wax on, Wax off.''
7. You can name at least half of the members of the elite ''Brat Pack.''
8. You can remember watching Full House and Saved by the Bell for endless hours!!!!!!
9. You have seen at least 10 episodes of Fraggle Rock. You know that another name for a keyboard is a ''Synthesizer."
10. You hold a special place in your heart for ''Back to the Future.''
11. You know where to go if you ''Wanna go where everybody knows your name.''
12. You thought Molly Ringwald was REALLY cool. (Was there an 80's movie she WASN'T in?) You know what ''Sike'' means.
13. You fell victim to 80's fashion: big hair, crimped, combed over to the side, and you wore spandex pants
14. You wanted to be a Goonie - (hey u guyz!!)You owned an extensive collection of Cabbage Patch Kids and trolls.
15. You actually saw Ted Danson as the MacDaddy he played ''Sam'' to be.
16. You ever wore fluorescent -neon if you will clothing...(or nail polish)
17. You could break dance, or wished you could.
18. You remember when ATARI was a state of the art video game system. (Remember Pong)
19. You know all the words to ''Ice Ice Baby''.You remember MC hammer well, and you can still sing the rap to "Fresh Prince of Bel Air"
20. You own any cassettes.
21. You were led to believe that in the year 2000 we'd all be living on the moon.
22. You remember and/or own any of the CareBear Glass collection from Pizza Hut.
23. Poltergeist freaked you out.
24. You carried your lunch to school in a Gremlins or an ET lunchbox.
25. You have ever pondered why Smurfette was the ONLY female smurf.
26. You wanted to communicate with some being named Cinergy.
27. You wanted to have an alien like Alf living in your house.
28. You wore biker shorts underneath a short skirt and felt stylish.
29. You wore tights under shorts and felt stylish.
30. You ever had a Swatch Watch.
31. You actually spent countless hours trying to perfect the care-bear stare.
32. You remember when Saturday Night Live was funny.
33. You had Wonder Woman or Superman underwear.
34. You wanted to be The Hulk for Halloween.You Believed that ''By the power of Greyskull, you HAD the power'
'35. You thought that Transformers were more than meets the eye.

Partying ''like it's 1999'' seemed SO far away!!!!!!!!!!!!

You were a 90's KID if...

1. You once used Wella Plum mousse or Sun-in in your hair that you thought it was totally original and highly stylish.
2. You owned a compilation tape with top tunes such as "Mr.Vain", "What is love" and "Rhythm is a dancer"
3. You owned a pair of Nike Air Max.
4. You wore plastic dummies around your neck, the bigger and more luminous the better
5. You owned a Benneton/NafNaf jumper
6. You went away and returned with a hair braid
7. You owned scrunchies in array of colours
8. You remember when Blur was better than Oasis.
9. You went to or dreamed about going to a smash hits concert
10. You remember when sweet valley high was a book
11. 10p crisps! e.g. Meanies, Wheelies
12. Levi 501's
13. Captain planet, James Bond junior and Sharkie and George crime busters of the sea!
14. Puffa jackets
15. Impulse body spray
16. You remember life before alco-pops
17. Don't forget your toothbrush with Chris Evans
18. You had at least one troll
19. You know the dance to the Macarena and Saturday night
20. You believed 2 unlimited died in a car crash (they didn't)
21. You watched Baywatch and longed for the day that Eddie and Shauna got together.
22. Swatch Pop watches, your friend could show you the time from at least 20 feet away
23. You owned a Mood ring
24. You went into the Body shop to put on vanilla or white musk perfume
25. Black velvet hair bands with a puffy bit on top
26. Shell Suits and Bum Bags
27. Count Duckula and Trap-Door
28. Black velvet chokers with a little pendant hanging from them
29. You longed to live in Beverly Hills 90210
30. Fruit shaped and scented soaps that usually came from a body shop basket you got for your birthday! That and nail-varnish.
31. Waistcoats on girls
32. You couldn't listen to Salt 'n' Pepa around your parents
33. Fruit salads and Black jacks
34. Who framed Roger Rabbit?
35. Ear cuffs/Muffs

As for me I was a '79 baby and shamefully remember things from both lists. Memories are meant to be treasured, so if you can even admit to having worn a bright yellow/pink/green shell suit, thought yourself cool by shouting "By the power of grey skull, I have the power" at top of your lungs in the school playground, or that you even proudly sang along to Vanilla Ice while waiting in anticipation and gossiping with friends about his movie debut then you are truly a brave person. As for me I am pleading the 5th and on that note i bid you Au reviour!


LSGS

When men become my plaything

I must admit something, some people collect stamps, others collect shoes (something that I do too) and then there is the woman, who like myself, collect admirers.


It is only recently that I have come to realise that I have a collection of men who I like to keep on tap. So whenever the need arises in me, I am not talking about sex (mind and gutter people), oh no, I shamefully keep them around for a good old fashioned ego boost. I know, I know its bad, but I cannot help myself.


It is just that sometimes I get bored and when I am bored I like to call them for a good chin wag (which means a great conversation my non-british friends) with my admirers, and when I have had my fill I say goodbye and never bother with them until next time- sigh- terrible I know! It is just that, they are men I dated but I could not have a relationship with because the spark was missing, which leaves the men in limbo with me- they are not quite friends and yet they are not relationship material.


You might think that the men might get tired of our flimsy excuse for a friendship but they do not. They seem to happily allow me to pick them up when i want them, and just as quickly set them down when i am done.


So on that note, all i can say is "dance my puppets, dance".


LSGS